I want someone who is my intellectual equal, though that doesn’t mean just schooling or anything like that. I need someone who can think critically and imaginatively. Curiosity and the need to continue learning and growing is a must.
I want someone with whom to share my interests, and who will share hers with me. This doesn’t mean that we have to come to be interested in all of the same things, just that we share what we love with one another. I want someone who can interest me in things I never would have thought I could be.
I want someone who will challenge me to try new things and to travel to new places.
I want someone who is extroverted enough that she can draw me out, while still understanding my introversion and being able to live with and love that.
I want someone who is as much of a thinker as I am, rather than approaching everything on the basis of feelings.
I want someone who holds complementary views to mine on certain, fundamental topics, that are important to me. These include religion and politics. We don’t have to agree completely, but this cannot be an area of conflict.
I want someone who stimulates me intellectually, emotionally, and sexually. I don’t believe that a healthy relationship can be built on only one kind of connection, so weaving all of these together is important.
I want someone who can respect my sometimes need for personal space and yet also comfortably invade it when appropriate.
I want someone who understands the value of comfortable quiet. Whether it be on a rock on a mountain side or a bench in a park, the ability to just sit and open yourself to the world, calmly and quietly, is beautiful.
I want someone who understands that every relationship is a work in progress and that communication is the key to understanding, understanding being the key to happiness.
A friend described her ideal relationship in a way that makes a lot of sense to me.
My ideal relationship is someone where we can wake up together, cook together, spend part of the day hiking or going somewhere new, having a fun night with friends, going home, reading separate books, talk about what we learned, and go to bed together. That is what I want. Where we can be together and be alone. And that’s not a bad thing. I can go out with friends, he can go out, but we trust each other. And at the end of the day, we know we’re each other’s.